Them Hustlers Read online

  But the sly congressman managed his exit gracefully. Tucker was smart enough to carefully weigh his options, being realistic with the help of ample amounts of Pappy van Winkle. Tucker let word slip in a hometown newspaper about his brush with cancer. The resulting wave of sympathy made easier his negotiations for a parachute landing into Tulane, as professor emeritus for American Law and Populism. The Populism label was his insistence.

  Later in the year the congressman announced he would not be running for re-election. By the end of that week two lawyers and a publisher from his district had publicly declared their intent to seek the Democratic nomination for the Tucker seat for United States Congress. Each one enjoyed the backing from the oil or gas or sugar or insurance companies. Each preached a new era of populism. All were polite towards Tommy Tucker, as his endorsement was a sought after prize. After all, he was leaving with no stain of scandal, and still popular with the voters. Tucker met with the candidates before gravitating towards a lawyer in his mid-40s named Billy Baker. This was a man, Tucker believed, who understood the unwritten rules. Should Baker win, and the odds were good, Tucker would have an entree back into Washington. Not to the inner ring of power, but as a 'gray haired' ambassador for the good state of Louisiana and her interests.

  * * *

  Gigi/Lucie was the quickest of the Tucker entourage to adjust to their new situation. Like awakening from a long dream, Gigi lost her interest in Tommy Tuckers' political life when she learned of Herb’s violent accident. Leaving Phil’s place after conjuring up more mischief, she ran straight into Gregory and Rachel. The two worried friends had driven first to Phil’s warehouse and then decided to check out the house. Seeing Gigi, Rachel for the first time in her life abandoned all pretense of journalistic neutrality and began pummeling the voodoo priestess with blows from her backpack, pulling Gigi’s hair, and yelling how ‘Phil better be alive…’ and ‘how Herb was now in the hospital, damn you.’

  Instead of fighting back, Gigi began crying and begging for forgiveness. Her unexpected remorse did nothing to stop Rachel’s attack. The reporter finally had to be pulled away by Gregory.

  Whether Gigi was responsible for what happened that day she couldn't say. Nor did she know in her heart if the black magic was ever a factor in Tucker winning elections or causing an opponent to withdraw. The truth was she had taken the gobs of cash from Tanya because it was fun. The whole Washington experience, until the mess with Phil, had been fun.

  Trying to find a rational answer Gigi went to the Library of Congress while Herb was still in the hospital and looked up deer crashes with automobiles. Was what happened to Herb McDermott her doing? She found solace in discovering hundreds of incidents of deer running into cars in Maryland in one year alone. And dozens of drivers died annually across the country. But no statistics could make her feel blameless and she wanted out. So after weeks of back and forth long-distance discussions, a meeting was arranged between the Bienvenue family and the Davis family at a hotel next to National Airport.

  On February 12th, the exact day that Bill Clinton was acquitted in the Senate on the House impeachment charges, a new truce was drawn up, replacing the one in effect for decades. It called on the Bienvenue family to abstain from using their voodoo for political gain for as long as Gigi was alive. And to leave alone the widow of the fortune teller. It called on the Davis family to remove the curse put on Tanya Lyn Owens, which had made her lethargic and depressed. And to never interfere with Gigi or any future family of Gigi's. The agreement was signed by the blood of all present.

  Gigi got on the plane with her mother and left for New Orleans, where she planned to resume her business providing love spells for newlyweds. For the first week Gigi thought over and over about writing a note to Phil, or calling him, or writing to Herb's wife, but in the end did nothing.

  * * *

  Tanya adapted slowly to the new Washington order. Seeking a rest, she had gone home to Kentucky over the holidays and returned in January only to read in the newspaper about a big to-do party among Republicans "seeking to put behind them the turmoil of the past two years." Tanya had not been invited to the party. Hadn't even known about the event.

  In the first weeks of January her email inbox grew quiet. Missing was the usual tidbits on the status of oil and gas bills and the gossip from key political handlers; the sort of info that provided her with the cachet of being an insider. Information is the currency of Washington and Tanya was quickly going broke.

  In February she lost her first client ever. She had sent out the bi-annual bill before leaving for home and hadn't given it much thought until an email arrived with a terse statement that "given the changing political situation we can no longer envision employing the services of your firm at this time."

  Tanya exploded in anger. She was feeling better lately and her feisty energy had returned. It was the combative Tanya that called Tucker in a huff. The congressman interrupted her yelling. "You know why I haven't called you in the last few weeks?" He didn't wait for her guess. "Because the money is all but dried up. Not just for you. We're going down honey. And it won't be pretty."

  A second client hedged their bets and gave half the consulting work to a firm from Illinois. That confirmed what Tucker had said. Over a couple of Cosmopolitan martinis she decided a major reconnect in her life was necessary. The very next morning she impulsively packed a hefty box of dresses and handbags and dropped them off at a boutique that catered to previously owned designer clothes. The Georgetown shop had been a godsend when she was an up and coming lobbyist and Tanya figured that working in Frankfort, Kentucky would not require her vast wardrobe. Then she told friends she was readjusting her business model, looking to get involved more in state and regional matters rather than the pressure-cooker environment of Washington. Taking the final step she arranged for a crew from New Orleans to come and pack up the house.

  An ex-lover was a lobbyist in Frankfort, working in the health care industry. Tanya had seen what had happened to the senior aides of previous politicians caught up in scandals. What she needed was a place to be out of sight for a year or two. Reduce her profile, lick her wounds and then return when the whole incident was forgotten. There was no problem in the Kentucky firm taking on Tanya, especially with her national connections.

  By the time of the March ceremony for Herb she was already in Kentucky.

  * * *

  Bob Livingston of Louisiana was replaced as House Speaker-elect when Congress resumed in January by Congressman Dennis Hastert, the likeable insider from downstate Illinois who had no presidential aspirations. In other words, Hastert had reached the pinnacle of his power and was fine with that.

  Those connected to the new Speaker scrambled to gain from his unexpected good fortune. Some won. Some lost. The winners brought their own Tanya Owens, their own campaign bag of tricks, their own army of supporters, and soon a new inside power crowd was invited to the must-attend parties while new mistresses shopped at the Georgetown boutiques and a new crop of politicians met in the private clubs to scheme. And just like that, the unwritten, invisible organization chart for the Speaker of the House of Representatives had the boxes filled in. The allure of power does that.

  * * *

  Strangely enough, the promised further revelations of congressional sexual hypocrisy from Larry Flynt never materialized. No one in Washington was sure why though it was talked about for months afterwards. Coincidence perhaps, but once Rachel no longer had the Psychic Pimp feeding her the dirt from his clients, and she was no longer passing the information on to her chosen reporters, the pornographer and the national media moved on.

  That's the way it is in Washington. A scandal lingers only as long as there is still someone to knock down.

  # # #

  Other books by Jeffrey Manber

  “Lincoln’s Wrath” tells the story of an obstinate Pennsylvania publisher who sympathized with the South during the Civil War. Hodgson’s newspaper was shut by the administration and John Hodgso
n, a stubborn, passionate believe in freedom of the press, sued the Lincoln Administration.

  On one level this is the story of an angry, emotional, colorful and stubborn bigot who was also a passionate believer in freedom of the press. He took on an American icon named Lincoln because of his belief in the Constitutional right to a free press.

  Yet it is also a window into the actions of the Lincoln Administration as it tore up the basic rights of dissenting Americans in the name of preserving the Union. And it is the surprising new look at the great Lincoln as a politician extremely sophisticated at the use of the media.

  A never before told story, co-written with Neil Dahlstrom, which is must reading for those fascinated by the Civil War and those passionate on the freedom of the press.

  “The questions this book raises couldn’t be more timely: how does one criticize a president in wartime, and how can we ensure the freedom of the press at those moments when we need it most?”

  Publishers Weekly

  “Selling Peace” is a memoir based on Manber’s experience during much of the 1990s as the Russian and American space programs began working together. Manber was an eyewitness to the historic coming together of the once Cold War enemies. The memoir is filled with personal anecdotes of how Americans were perceived by the Russians, and how sometimes our worst enemy is ourselves.

  “Manber tells his story well as he and his fellow dreamers and doers traverse the globe, determined to plant a capitalist flag aboard a communist spacecraft. Highly recommended!”

  - Homer Hickam, Author of Rocket Boys/October Sky

  “The book of the month is Selling Peace by Jeffrey Manber…This is a very interesting insider’s account of an important period in space commercial development.“

  - Jerry Pournelle, Noted Science Fiction Writer